Why the fuss? Party biz moms say why they go all out…

I’ve seen it many times in the vast cyber-universe…why do some moms go so overboard with their kid’s birthday parties? I’ve heard people say that it’s ‘more for the mom than the kid’ or ‘to show off’ or ‘to out-do their friends’. Well, maybe there’s a miniscule percentage who do it for those reasons, but I’m here to tell you, along with several of my party peers, that for the other 99.937% of us, that is simply just not true.

When I was growing up, birthdays and holidays in general were shining moments in our lives. My mom always made us feel so special and those celebrations were magical. Now, I know back then candy buffets were not trending and party printables didn’t exist yet, but there were still decorations, party hats, party games and lots of homemade food. The nature of staying up into the wee hours of the night working on details has evolved over time, but love is always the reason.

As a parent, you want to give your child everything. And when your children are so young, you fear they won’t remember the special moments you shared together. The benefit we have today with technology is that we can capture these precious times and share them over and over again so that they never forget (translation: so that they always know how much love went into celebrating them). I’m not saying that going all out = how much you love your child, I’m just saying there’s nothing wrong with wanting to express it in that way. Some of my favorite moments are the quiet celebrations with just dinner and cake on the actual birthday with only immediate family. But the parties are great fun and create wonderful memories as well!

For me, creativity is how I express myself and as a mom, I always want my son to know that he was worth the time, energy, effort and details I put into his parties. Celebrating him doesn’t have to involve all those things some see as frivolous, but for one special day that is all about him, aside from friends and family, I want him to be surrounded by an environment filled with wonder and delight, fantasy and imagination; An environment that was created especially for him and no one else. As an event designer, why would I do this for my clients and not for my own child? That is ‘why the fuss’. -elissa, One Stone Events

Here’s why some of my other ‘Party Pro’ mom friends do it. Thanks to Dina, Michele, Jenny and Kori for weighing in!

Crafting, designing & parties are my creative outlet. When I design for others, it is an amazing experience bringing their vision to life. When the “client” is my own child, I go above and beyond – why? Because seeing my child’s eye twinkle and having him run up to me and tell me it’s the best day of his life is what drives me. When it’s an event for my family or my child, I can be as creative as I want to be – to truly create something beautiful, imaginative and simultaneously meet that need to create that I have inside me. It’s such a win / win. Mama gets to craft, which is mama’s outlet and my little man gets a magical day. Do I have to go all out? No, but I do because creating this is my passion.  -Dina, Deliciously Darling Events


Why do I put so much effort into a celebration? For the guest of honor. I love the expressions of awe and amazement, and while the compliments are encouraging, knowing they felt special, loved and worth-the-fuss means so much more. Something out-of-the-ordinary is not soon to be forgotten. In particular, I love it when my son see’s the decorations for his party and knows that I created it just for him. He still talks about his Firetruck party and it’s been two years! Not to mention the photos of these celebrations that he’ll have to remind him how special he is both to me and those who joined the celebration. The point for me is that it creates such fun and fond memories both for the kids and the adults. -Michele, Intrigue Design Studio/Crazy For Design


In our family, we love to celebrate both the big milestones and the small. I enjoy crafting, painting, and styling so of course my boys see the creative process happening around them and want to join in. They love to craft, bake, and decorate with me.  It is quality time we can spend together. We DIY almost everything from the desserts to activities and decorations. I find that the meaningful little details are what truly matter. There is something so simple, yet special about a birthday party at home with close friends. Those are the memories that I hope my children will cherish forever. Each party is made with love… the same way the blanket my Grandmother crocheted me was, or the cross-stitch my Mother made me. I guess it runs in the family to express love to each other through our own special creative outlets.  Jenny, Craft that Party


To me, hosting a party for someone is like giving them a gift. I want to put thought, time, and love into it…and I want them to feel that! Whether it’s a baby shower for a friend, or a birthday for one of my little ones…it’s a way for me to express how much they mean to me. I celebrate my kids, friends, and family being a part of our lives everyday, but a party is a way to find something that makes the guest of honor happy and then take it to the max! At the end of the day, my greatest joy in hosting a party is seeing the guest of honor smiling from ear to ear with memories to carry a lifetime. Kori, Paper & Pigtails


What do you do to make your child feel special on their birthday? What makes you feel special on your birthday? Did your parents do anything to go all out on your special day when you were growing up? Please share in the comments. I’d love to hear about it!

(To see more photos from these awesome parties, simply click on the picture.)



  1. Audrey says:

    Seriously…LOVE this article! So well-said :) I hate having to justify the “WHY” of my parties. I don’t care that other people don’t go “all-out” so why does it seem that people care that I do? The “you have too much time on your hands” comment drives me insane! I have two children under 5, watch my nephew daily, and run a home-based baking business….trust me…having too much time is never a problem. I just make time for the things that are important to me and totally understand that is different for everyone. Example: I’ll devote an entire evening to creating elf-sized clothing, as opposed to folding the mountain of laundry piling up – lol. Hearing my son tell me, “Mom…that was the BEST birthday EVERRRRRRR!” makes it ALL worth it…every bit!

  2. Jenny says:

    Thank you for including me in this post, I love hearing why other moms do what “we” do… it’s always from the heart and with lots of love!

  3. Well said Ladies!! Although my children are grown when they were little throwing fabulous parties was also my way of letting my children know that I loved them and that creating wonderful memories for them was my number one priority.It was also important to me let my guests know that their participation at these parties mattered. I have been to many parties where stuff was thrown on a plate and the host thought it was fabulous and all I could think was a little effort would have been nice. Creating birthday memories just takes some time and a little effort it reallydoesn’t cost a lot………..unless your paying for it ;)

  4. Fantastic article and point of view from some very talented party mamas! I love celebrating life’s precious moments with my kids and creating memories with them through birthday celebrations, holidays and every day events. I strongly believe that a fabulous and creative party doesn’t have to cost a lot, it’s more about the love that went into creating it!

  5. Mayra Rivera says:

    Great post! Loved reading all these party mommas take on it!

  6. Rene says:

    This is a fantastic post – I couldn’t agree with your talented mommas more! Audrey, I am right there with you – I hate having to justify why I do it or how I find the time -to me it is important so I make the time.

  7. Fabulous article! Thanks so much for putting into words what I can’t seem to convey to most! 8)

  8. So so true!!!